End of a LONG week

[written July 3, 2009: but I fell asleep on the laptop.. so it was not posted. ]

Hey all, how is your long week? Me, I am so tired… So tired that I keep asking people for hugs – even online, but not so much offline. Since my last post, let’s just say that a lot of things has happened. I need to write them down so as to unload some of the weight that feels like lead in my heart, brain, and.. soul? This is bound to be a long post, so sit back, grab some coffee, and start hitting the down button.. or the mousewheel, whichever floats your boat.

Back to School Lurchie

Okay, I never thought I would go back to school. Sure, I mean, I always wanted to, but knowing myself to be a very deliquent student, I feared going back to school. I guess I lost the fear because last Monday, I enrolled myself at a Masters program at Silliman University. We have classes every Saturday only, which is cool – that means I have to go to school tomorrow. Hopefully, we will just get loads of assignments and be dismissed early so I can grab some Zzzs.. So that will be three subjects, that are computer related, of course, but I think this is somewhat geared for higher positions such as project management.

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Oh, Snapped!

I remember a couple of months ago somebody spoke to me about how camp minus prison has affected their lives. I guess to some it is still a walk in the park. Even I can safely say that it is not that hard for me these days.

However, not everybody can adapt to the hard life at camp minus prison. I can attest to this fact since somebody did eventually snap at work. It is a scary thing, really. Who knew that somebody go down that road. Oh sure, we often joke that one day somebody would really go crazy from working at camp minus prison, but often we simply counter this by saying that we were already nuts.

Who knew what was going on in the mind of that employee..? Sources say that she was working on the night shift, and as is the usual with camp minus prison, they asked her to extend her schedule so as to accomodate more work done – yes, overtime. She was the silent type, and during that day, some people said she was beginning to talk to herself. This wouldn’t really raise many eyebrows at camp minus prison since one general rule is that you must not talk when working – a rule we often break but some do follow.

Now what sources say that happened was that her talking to herself became more abnormal or something, so the heads sent her off to the canteen to eat breakfast/lunch. When she came back, some said she was not feeling well or she was still in a state of shock or something, so the heads sent her to the clinic so that the doctor might give her a check-up. Suffice it to say that perhaps she really snapped while at the clinic. How so? Well, she locked up the doors in the clinic – with the nurses inside – and told the nurses not to open the door because there were monsters outside.

I have no idea how they managed the situation, but what my colleagues tell me is that she was escorted outside, just around lunchtime, so she could be taken to the DSWD or the proper authorities. This is not exactly gossip folks, but she did snap. I am not saying that she really is/was crazy, but she snapped. The exact details as to how the day went are still a bit hazy, but a lot of people saw what happened, and with the number of workers working at camp minus prison, hardly anything is kept a secret.

I feel sorry for the employee. Truly, camp minus prison is not a pretty place. Perhaps she had some tough problems, plus the stress, and the heavy work pushed her over the edge. We cannot blame her. Almost everybody else at camp minus prison is prone to go down that path. It could be the combination of everything, or she could have had just a little too much all at once.

I pray that she is well, and that somebody can give her the help she deserves.

I have arrived at my own diagnosis!!

So I did get an ECG. Who wouldn’t get one if two birds kept harping on you to get one? Couple that with threats, and then some. So I did get an ECG.

However, being the sloth that I have become lately, I have not yet shown the results to the doctor. And to avoid getting creamed by nutcases, I chose to go invisible online.

I have done some research though on the possible diagnosis of the ECG results as per interpretation of the doctor who supposedly wrote the findings for my doctor to spell out to me. From what I could decipher in their clinical text is, I am not dying. Contrary to my earlier predictions of my walking into the light, i do not think I have any heart problems, nor do I think I have full blown hypertension. Methinks I have a case of hyper acidity which is a bit on the heavy side.

Why do I think so? As per research, I have all the symptoms of hyper acidity. And regarding my history with the illness, I have been suffering hyper acidity on and off over the years. In fact, one of the only two times that I was hospitalized (except for the times when I gave birth) was due to hyper acidity. And even when i was pregnant with Sophie, the doctor had me on a three-times-a-day dosage of Kremil-S. So it could be hyper acidity.

I am well aware that I have been having hyperacidity for a couple of months now. I think the severity just escalated recently. However, since it has more or less become a norm for me to have hyper acidity, I have simply brushed it off – I was just too busy or lazy to do anything about it. I simply popped a pill or two to relieve the pain, forgetting that it was more or less the same ordeal I had undergone when I was pregnant with Sophie.

Here are some causes of hyper acidity or gastritis:

• prolonged ingestion of aspirin or some anti-inflammatory drugs
• prolonged alcohol ingestion
• eating of spicy and highly seasoned food
• stress
• heavy smoking

and others..

The symptoms?

• steady pain in the upper abdomen immediately after aspirin ingestion or spicy meal
• nausea, vomiting, or no desire to eat
• heartburn or sour belching
• sense of abdominal distension/bloating
• flatulence
• shortness of breath

It could be that my trouble of breathing is the “shortness of breath” part of the symptom? Of course the sour belching is already there. The bloating (check!), nausea (check!), STRESS (gazillion checks!!), etc. Although I do not have a thing for spicy food, I think I might be high on the oily food though.

Anyway, that is my diagnosis of my current condition. Perhaps I should tell the doctor about it huh?

Can Stress Cause Weight Gain?

Here is something that almost everybody swears to be true. Perhaps T2 Dean might beg to differ, but a lot of people really say it’s true. And I, for one, will continue to believe it. Especially since my daily article from SparkPeople say so, too!

However, despite what others say that it is because of hormonal changes from the high stress that can make one gain weight, it turns out that that is not exactly true. While research does prove that high stress can make one gain weight, it is mainly because stress makes people stop their good eating habits and exercising that formerly helped them stay in shape.

What it is, actually, is the fact that when people get stressed, they find it hard to fall asleep. Lack of sleep in turn leads to low levels of leptin (hormone) which could cause an increased in appetite. And, tired people run to food so to have more energy. Ergo, weight gain.

And another thing affecting our overly shapely bodies is cortisol. More information here.

It makes my heart ache whenever I read stuff like this. It reminds me very well of my really unhealthy lifestyle! Yeah, well, it actually makes me think if Bill Gates, and other millionaires lived healthy lifestyles when they were still starting their empires. Yeah, I can dream.. and I can try.. Whatever.

At any rate, it all boils down to the fact that I do need to perform a great balancing act. It shouldn’t be too hard… should it?

For better life!!

Stress Management

As a first step to a goal of wellness improvement, I have impulsively bought a book on Stress Management, 2 days before last year’s end.

The book is entitled: “speaking of Stress Management through Yoga and Meditation” by Pandit Shambhu Nath

Oh sure, I have managed to open the book despite my over busy time schedule. I must say it is very very interesting. I’m quite convinced that it will help me a bit on my quest to rid myself of all the stress that consumes me almost every single day. I think it is somewhat a must read for those who are prone to stress, and those who are even too busy to think of stress. You’d know if you’re stressed out when you keep telling people, “No, I am not stressed out!!” hehehe.. see?

Mmmmmmmmm… Oh! wait! you’re still here..? Hehehe.. drifted off to a peaceful state. Hah! My attempt at de-stressing. Do enjoy the book!