yes, folks, it is a movie. maybe you’ve heard about it, or maybe you havent. i haven’t heard about the movie but seen it, i have. i saw it last night when the cable was on the fritz and i had nothing else to do but find movies on our DVD collection.

so there it was… sitting untouched amongst the group. i thought back, and remembered that i had planned to watch it but never had the time. so that was it.

the movie is quite good actually. more like Sophie’s World put into a video minus the philosophical conversations and other hooblah.. but i think the concept is there nonetheless. but this time i think there are more discussions about literature rather than philosophy. im too tired to write down the whole synopsis right now [my stomach hurts] but i would like to refer you here.

just my comments on the movie… after you’ve read the summary or seen the movie, it makes you realize that you really have to make every moment count. and don’t you think that if your life is too precise and calculated, it really is boring, isn’t it? it feels so sad.. so.. empty. makes me thank God my life is chaotic so at least there is life to it. [though sometimes i do wish it were a bit subdued. ] ahh well.. life is as life gets.

in the movie, dustin hoffman tells will ferrell to “live” his life.. and he replies with.. i do want to live my life!! and hoffman replies saying that he [ferrell] should do what he wants to do while he still has his life… reading between the lines, i think he is correct. in the movie ferrell learns that his death is going to be imminent. that being said, it could be any time at all. so that is why hoffman tells him to live his life. make his life story the way he wants it to be.

[im going back to lazy mode again.. take care!!!!!!]

i dream

of wide open spaces

of clouds so fluffy and white

of the bluest sky so infinite and clear

of winds so strong yet soothing

i dream

of waves that crash and foam

of waters of intense turquoise

of high cliffs to infinity

of me looking on to eternity

yet i wake

to the hum of artificial air

to see colors through an artificial window

to padded footsteps on artificial grass

to water from an artificial waterfall

i wake

from my peace and see false light

from my fantasy to see reality

from happiness to dread and

from freedom and back to prison camp

but i wont fret

for tomorrow is another day

and though i wish i could stay

i know i can always visit

my castles in the air.

~~~

*shrugs* i know it needs a LOT of work. hehe it is probably the 5th poem i have ever written in my whoooole life..! zheon is the poet. me? i just ramble..

latez!!! [so little time... so much to do..]

okay, im done whining. i guess i just have to get well, dont i?

~~~~~

in other news, the SPURS are playing tomorrow! at 7 a.m.!! as usual, i am ecstatic. i was bummed when they lost their first game.. but i have not lost hope. it is a “best-of-seven” thing anyway. so.. GO SPURS, GOOOOOOO!!!!

~~~~~

just for the heck of it.. i hereby challenge myself to write a poem [writing poems is soooo not me...]. the poem shall be finished by friday. till then.. you will hear more crazy rants, write ups about blah blahs from me..

yes, i am on hyper mode. i am allowing my soul to scream, rant, shout, and yell here because i, my friends, have lost my voice. tah!!!

XOXO

last night i had a hard time falling asleep. there were so many things that raged through my head..most of all, i kept seeing snapshots of moments with gino, and the so many what could have’s… it made me look at my life and assess it’s worth and how much more it could be. it made me see how putting off something today may mean a time lost [God forbid] should anything happen.

as i looked at my children and my husband, i realized that i had not been spending much time with that as i was too busy at work, and when i came home at night, i was just too tired to even play with sophie. a zombie as te sar would say. and yes, they do not deserve that.

as i rummaged through my cellphone inbox, i found a message i had read hastily and failed to reply to. it was from an online friend who managed to hook up with my real-life friends who i had lost touch in years. funny how the world seems so small… reading it made me think about the importance of keeping in touch with friends online or offline. i thought about my BuLuYaGoNz who had complained time and time again about our lack of time for them. God knows even they are busy.

but i guess things have changed.. i dont own my own time like i used to. i have things to do, people to attend to, and there is that quest for moolah. but i guess i should not forget about the things that count.. the people around me.

my mom and other people once said that one must work hard – for practicality’s sake. and raise money for the family… repay the “utang na loob” and other stuff. i see their point.. but i guess i will never see everything fully because all i can see is the pain of the what if’s and the people left behind.

this eye opener has made me realize the things i must do. i must have time to make sure that the people that matter know that i care.

Man is like a breath; his days are like fleeting shadow. – Psalm 144:4

Gin Yurgen Cliff Olegario Dionaldo

July 17, 1980 – April 21, 2007